The viral memories and the hidden vices

If my memories had view-counters like a video on the web, some memories would hardly have any views and others would be well-worn, their view-counters easily spinning up to double digits or more. As relentless as an ad algorithm, my mind can replay some of these memories when at rest. 

After some work trying to root out pockets of sin, it's clear that the worst parts of me tend to hide behind the best, or camouflage themselves that way: 

• If I want to be the MVP, I am likely to undervalue the contributions of others, or not make space for them. 
• If I am being helpful and kind, are my motives always pure, or is there some hope of being noticed and valued? 
• If I am being funny, have I done it at someone else's expense? 
• If I am noticing faults in others, am I doing it to think better of myself? 
• Am I a peacemaker, or am I avoiding conflict? 
• Am I patient, or am I undecided on the next step? 
• Am I overworked in one area of life, or am I avoiding unpleasant tasks in another area? 
• Am I focused on justice, or am I having trouble forgiving? 

When I look for my own vices, I might do well to see what's hiding behind my virtues. "Simultaneously saints and sinners," as they say in some circles.